13. Miami Dolphins

This one is going to make Josh mad.

I was discussing this list with my buddy Josh, and avid Redskins fan (except now he’s more of a Tom Brady fan — Not Pats…just Tom Brady). He shook his head for a few minutes and said, “You’re really telling me that there are 13 better jerseys than the Redskins?” After a few minutes, he looked up at a nearby TV screen turned to ESPN. The highlights from a preseason game featuring the Cleveland Browns popped onto the screen, and he said, “Wait…the Browns! You haven’t ranked the Browns yet! That’s the ugliest jersey! Look at it!”

That’s the beauty of this list: it’s subjective, and it’s guaranteed to upset some people. And with that, I present to you the sure-to-be-polarizing number thirteen: the Miami Dolphins.

These uniforms haven’t changed much since 1966. Look up the nard-nosed, mustached Larry Csonka, and you’ll find him wearing some familiar clothes. And that’s okay. Why? Because the Miami Dolphins jerseys fit the city, their colors are unique, and they’re pleasant enough to look at that they remind you of Floridian retirement communities (yet somehow not seeming geriatric).

Brandon Marshall, summing up the Dolphins' upcoming season fortune...

Enjoy your new home, Reggie.

Distinct. Perfect, no. But definitely distinct.

Not sure about those alternates though…

Orange you glad I won't forever be your quarterback?

And now the real reason that the dolphins are ranked so highly:

"Squeak, sqeeeeeeak!!!"

1. Who doesn’t love dolphins (besides sharks and small, delicious fish)?
2. The colors breathe Florida.
3. He’s wearing a football helmet without the face mask, like the tough players in the 1930s.
4. He has a sun behind him. Florida, sun, etc.
5. Again…it’s a dolphin. Everyone loves dolphins!

Also, this guy loves the Dolphins:

And lastly, the Dolphins were the favorite team of an awesome man named Buddy Inge, who extended an open invitation to me and my Dad for each and every Monday Night Football game. He passed away several years ago, but every time I see the Dolphins, I think of Bro. Buddy. I don’t remember what he said about the Dolphins’ uniforms, but I do remember that it brought me around to them, and I can at least say they’re “pretty good.” No doubt.

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